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Harry Potter star Paapa Essiedu hopes his TV drama Babies will break pregnancy loss silence

"If it makes one person able to talk about pregnancy loss when they previously couldn't, I think the show will have been a success," says Paapa Essiedu.
For the British actor that is the measure of impact for Babies - a series that places difficult, often unspoken experiences at its centre.
The drama follows Lisa and Steven, a couple in their 30s trying for a baby, as they navigate the emotional complexities of pregnancy loss and the strain it places on their relationship.
For its cast, bringing that reality to screen meant stepping into deeply personal and, for many, unfamiliar territory.
Essiedu says he immersed himself in the subject, working with specialists and midwives to understand an experience he had never been close to.
"I'm not a parent and I've never been around someone giving birth so I found it incredibly informative," he says.
His co-star Siobhán Cullen also drew on a mix of medical guidance and personal insight.
She describes having midwives on set as "invaluable" but she also had conversations with women in her own life, many of whom had experienced pregnancy loss.
Many of them have gone through something similar to Lisa and they were very generous in sharing their experiences and the journey to becoming a parent.
Stories about miscarriage and pregnancy loss can be underrepresented on screen, and Cullen hopes this show will create "a space for someone to share".
Essiedu attributes the lack of conversation around these topics to a broader discomfort around grief.
There's a sensitivity around any kind of grief and an assumption that those questions shouldn't be asked," explains the 35-year-old. "That can lead to there being stigma and shame around the topic, and that's when people feel isolated and alone.
He credits the writer and director, Stefan Golaszewski, for creating a show that at it's core has "such humility and honest".
Golaszewski's other series writing credits include Bafta-winning BBC comedies Mum and Him & Her, along with the BBC drama Marriage.
Speaking to the BBC, Golaszewski says he's been through similar experiences to those dealt with in the show. However it's not an autobiographical account of his life so he was "able to create something more objectively dramatic".
I was aware of the good and positivity that can come from opening up about this subject matter that's so difficult to talk about.
He hopes the show will "create a space where people can feel less alone" as issues such as miscarriages "have a stigma around it".
He adds that sometimes issues such as pregnancy loss are often medicalised, so there's a disconnect between someone's experience of grief - and how others perceive it.
In contrast to the fast-paced dramas audiences may be more familiar with, Babies lingers in the quiet - the pauses, the unfinished conversations and the things left unsaid between its characters.
Golaszewski explains it's not intentional and he's showing that "the truth of grief is that it is banal".
Your heart is blown to pieces but do you still need to eat dinner and go to work so I'm not stylistically chasing silence, just representing the truth of it.
While pregnancy loss is often framed as something experienced primarily by women, Babies highlights the shared emotional impact within relationships.
In the show, Steven struggles to recognise his own grief, as Lisa repeatedly reminds him that the loss is shared, telling him: "they are your babies too."
Essiedu says there can be a tendency to view miscarriage only as a physical issue.
There's often a physiological and emotional impact that's shared and that isn't given the same weight as the physical impact maybe because it's more difficult to see.
Both actors say the project has shifted their own perspectives on parenthood and relationships.
For Cullen, it has made her "more compassionate", particularly towards those who have struggled to become parents.
There's an assumption we naively hold that when we want children it will just happen but that's not a privilege we're all granted so it's made me more compassionate in that regard.
Essiedu says the experience has changed how he shows up for others and it's made him want "to be a better friend to those who are going through anything".
For a series centred on what goes unsaid, both actors reflected on how difficult it can be to open up in real life.
In Babies, Steven often uses humour to deflect from what he is really feeling, a coping mechanism that masks the depth of his grief.
It is something Essiedu recognises more broadly in how people navigate difficult emotions.
He describes opening up as taking "a leap of faith" and says he's "very proud of moments in my life where I have taken that leap".
It's awful and you feel naked and open to attack because you worry about being rejected and maybe sometimes that will happen but when it doesn't that's where intimacy and close relationships start to grow.
He adds that he's tries "not to be judgemental of past versions of myself who haven't been able to do that".
That tension between vulnerability and self-protection extends beyond the themes of the show.
Essiedu says he's received death threats for his casting as Severus Snape in HBO's Harry Potter series.
"I'd be lying if I said I was a completely impenetrable robot," he tells the BBC.
But alongside the negativity, he points to a wave of support.
Since the trailer, there's been a flood of positivity, people are being incredibly supportive of the show and my involvement in it and that makes me excited for what is to come.
He adds that he has "always had limited engagement with social media and public opinion" as he knows that "no one will be able to please everybody".
There's something about being put in this position where you want to please everyone, but you can't and I've known that from a pretty early stage.
Babies is broacast on Monday 30 March at 21:00 BST on BBC One
If you have been affected by any of the issues raised in this story, information and support can be found at the BBC's Action Line.
Source: BBC
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